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They never add the disclaimers or side effects that come with doing energy/spiritual work. The mainstream does an excellent job of showing the happy meditator and the joyful manifester complete with images of shiny crystals and curated backgrounds usually with fountains and plants in the background. What is often left out is the fact that there is always discomfort that arises when doing any kind of transpersonal work. You can’t expect to move out of the status quo without it. You and I can have all the hope and faith in the world. We can believe that everything that happens in our lives is working for us and our greater good. However, that doesn’t always make the work easy.
Anything that changes you, especially from the inside out, can come with tests of faith, deep questioning, and strains on your relationships. This is the stuff that usually stays out of the Instagram feeds or carefully cultivated Facebook pages. There is even a tendency to gloss over this part of the story in blog posts. I can only assume that it would be much harder to sell yoga pants and essential oils if people thought that their lives might get more messy before they start to get better. I also tend to believe that often, after the hard work, we are in such a better space than we were before that all the trouble and uncomfortable moments seem like distant memories or even tiny blessings that bring you to a version of you that almost forgets that you went through it. I have never heard of someone that had gone through a “dark night of the soul” experience that didn’t, in hind sight, become grateful for it because it brought them to the place where they are on the other side.
I have had my friendly share of amazing synchronistic moments and a healthy dose of blessings in my time, I share a lot about them in my writings. I would be remiss not to mention that I have also had my fair share of difficulties, trials, and challenges along my journey as well. It is a disservice to create the illusion of constant fairy tale experiences complete with chipper animals and prince charming helping me along the way without reminding you that these stories are also filled with darker subplots, moments of self doubt, and difficult situations that arise throughout.
The hero journey that we all embark on in our life is not unlike the Disney movies or epic adventure sagas that we all flock to the theaters to be a part of. There is a reason they are so popular. We see ourselves in them. Life isn’t always easy and sometimes in adventures, we discover things we didn’t anticipate or desire. That doesn’t make it any less fulfilling, usually it is just the opposite. The more we can shine a light on the dark shadow stuff hiding below the surface, the less scary it becomes.
Every time you think you get a handle on something and are reaping the benefit from your new found acceptance or knowledge, something new will come about and take you on a whole new round of “wtf just happened”. It’s a cyclical game of discovering a new facet of yourself, adapting to it, digging deeper, freaking out about it, accepting it, then happily living it while trying to get your bestie to do the same.
The fact remains that even when you are ready to do the work and really dig in deep, the people around you may not have also signed up for the ride. It takes time and patience for them to get used to the new you with boundaries or a more open throat chakra. It can rattle your world, but it can really shake up theirs as well.
So do the meditation and deep breathing, but don’t expect to sit in quiet and not have something pop up that may need to be addressed. Become more mindful, but also be mindful of the people around you that are at different stages than you on their journey. Read self help books, but remember that you invited the help. Try rocking, but don’t be surprised by the tears that may flow more easily.
I don’t say any of this to scare you away or discourage you from doing any of the modalities that bring you to a greater sense of peace or increased comfort in your own skin, only as a disclaimer to perhaps tread carefully. Think of it as the big poster hanging before you get on a roller coaster: Warning, this ride reaches high speeds and can become really intense at times. There will be highs and lows, ups and downs, and sometimes you’ll be shaken around a bit. It’s not for the faint of heart, but it leaves you feeling euphoric and bouncy as you exit. And for some reason you go back and get on again and again.